The Family of Dhamma
- by S. N. Goenka

The following is the closing address by Goenkaji at the Annual Meeting at Dhamma Thalī on 5 January 1993. It was first published in the VRI publication For the Benefit of Many, which is a compilation of Goenkaji’s talks and answers to questions from Vipassana students. It has been adapted for the Newsletter.)

My dear Dhamma sons and Dhamma daughters:

The report that I just heard was quite positive. The Dhamma family is growing and this is a good sign. But at the same time it must grow in a proper way. The whole Vipassana family should be united without any disharmony.

Great responsibility rests on those who serve Dhamma. Serving starts at the stage when someone joins a camp as a Dhamma server in order to develop one’s own pāramīs, one’s own meditation, by serving people. Having learned the technique, now one learns how to apply it in life in a very congenial atmosphere. When you are in the world, you may find that the atmosphere is not very good and you are not very successful in applying Dhamma. Here, the atmosphere is wonderful; all around there are Dhamma vibrations. While you are serving the students, quite possibly one of them might generate negativity and speak harshly to you, or may not accept the discipline. If you become irritated and generate negativity, you are not working properly. You should immediately realize, “Well look, I am here to serve people, to eradicate my negativity, not to work like a policeman or a policewoman.”

When you meditate, you are not supposed to react to sensations, yet at times you find that when an unpleasant sensation arises, the part of the mind which has the habit of reacting starts doing so. But how quickly do you realize, “Oh no, I have started reacting with aversion.”? When you do, you come back to equanimity. A pleasant sensation arises, and you react with craving. You reacted because you are not perfect. But then how quickly do you realize, “Well look, I have reacted. Now, I must come back to observing with equanimity; I must come out of this craving”?

Similarly, when you are serving people and you have reacted wrongly, how quickly do you realize, “Oh, no, I am here to serve people, and I have made a mistake”? Come back. Always serve with love and compassion. Every action that you take, every suggestion that you give to a meditator must be with a very calm, quiet, harmonious mind, full of love and compassion.

Serving on a course is a training ground for you. You are successful here and then you can apply what you have learned in the outside world.

Along with Dhamma servers, there are some who manage the courses or the centres. This is a big responsibility for managers. A manager must have very congenial relations with the Dhamma servers and the meditators. Management should be full of love and compassion.

Then you have children’s course teachers. Their work is very important. Unfortunately, the present generation has a big burden of sectarianism, of communalism. All these struggles, strife and killing are going on because people have forgotten Dhamma and regard only their own sect as important. Everyone tries to build up one’s own sect without wanting to build up Dhamma in oneself.

We should not pass this inheritance to the coming generation; they should be saved from the madness of sectarianism. If Dhamma is given to them at a young age, pure Dhamma, free from sectarianism, universal Dhamma, they will understand, “I am a human being and whether I call myself a Hindu or a Muslim or a Christian or a Jain, it doesn’t matter.” One is a human being only when one lives the life of Dhamma. Otherwise a person has lost his or her humanity. So from a young age, children must understand how to live in Dhamma as good human beings.

The technique to develop Dhamma within oneself is given to them. Sīla, samādhi and paññā are universal: this must be understood at a very young age so that children get this training in pure Dhamma. If they are given this with love and compassion, they will accept it. The information I get from these children’s courses is very encouraging, because benefits are coming. More children’s courses are essential. That is why I want more children’s course teachers to take up this job.

And then there are the assistant teachers. It is a serious responsibility for the assistant teachers who have to give these ten-day courses. People will come to these courses if the assistant teacher is working properly, with the volition to serve people, not just developing one’s ego. Do not think, “Now I am an assistant teacher, I sit on the Dhamma seat, and everybody bows down to me three times. Wonderful!” One has to come out of that ego. You are here to serve. When students are bowing down, they are bowing down to Dhamma, not to you. This point should be very clear to everyone.

And then you have senior assistant teachers. Now their job is not only to give ten-day courses, but also serious courses. At the same time they give guidance and training to the assistant teachers and the junior assistant teachers who have been appointed.

Now the relationship between all these is very important. This is the inner core of the Vipassana family, from the Dhamma servers to the deputy teacher. If you quarrel, where is Dhamma? You are representatives of Dhamma. People examine Dhamma through you. They watch whether you live a proper life, and if so, they decide that Dhamma is good. If you are not living a proper life, they see it as all a sham. You will harm people by turning them away from the path of Dhamma. You have to be very careful, you have a big responsibility when you sit on the Dhamma seat.

If you get a higher post, understand, “Now I have an opportunity to serve in this way. ” Understand that there is no power. Each one has to serve, that is all. It is not like a hierarchy or bureaucracy where the senior has the power to dismiss the junior, or do that type of thing, which is dangerous.

If a senior finds that there is some defect in a junior, work with compassion and love, thinking, “I must take out whatever is wrong in this person. I must not drive this person away.” So with all the love try to rectify, to correct that junior.
And juniors must always have respect for the seniors. This is the tradition from the time of Buddha.

There was an incident at the time of Lord Buddha: when he returned to his homeland after his enlightenment, the people there might have had some sort of negativity towards him, wondering why he had run away from his responsibilities. But they found that he was such a wonderful person, and that what he had attained was good for the whole world, so naturally they were attracted to him.

A few princes decided that they should follow him and become monks, serve themselves and then serve others. When they reached the Buddha they gave all their ornaments and valuable clothes to a servant, a barber by the name of Upāli, saying, “We are going to become monks. You have these.” He thought, “These people who have lived such a luxurious life are leaving all this. What would I do with it all? Why don’t I also become a monk?”

The princes were from a very high caste. In this country unfortunately casteism was, and still is, the biggest malady, so the princes decided that the barber should be ordained first. The procedure was that someone who is ordained first is senior to the person ordained next. And a junior will always pay respect to a senior. The princes said to each other, “Every time we bow down to this barber, we will be dissolving our ego. If he pays respect to us, then our ego will not get dissolved.” What a wonderful way of thinking!

Similarly, anybody who is appointed earlier to these responsibilities will be seen as senior and respected by someone who is appointed later. Understand that he or she represents Dhamma, I bow down to Dhamma, and I have to respect them. Only then will the whole atmosphere be very congenial. The seniors must always have love and compassion for the juniors.

At the time of the Buddha, of course there were some who didn’t work properly, but the vast majority of his followers, the monks, etc., were renowned for this. Samaggā—“Look how they live united. Wonderful!” They were the followers of Buddha, the sons and daughters of Buddha.

You are all sons and daughters of Buddha, because you were given a new life with the words of Buddha. How did those sons and daughters of Buddha live? Samaggā—united, free from quarrelling, with happiness inside.

Sammodamānā—all the time there is compassion, love, happiness, cordiality. That is the quality of a Buddha putra or a Buddha putri, of a son or daughter of the Buddha. Avivadamānā—they don’t quarrel. If they quarrel then they are not fit sons and fit daughters.

And then, khīrodakībhūtā. Khīra means milk, udaka means water: they live like water and milk joined together; you can’t separate them. And they look at each other with love in their eyes, not with anger, not with red eyes. Their eyes are full of honey—piyacakkhū, so much love. This is their way of life. That ideal must be continued. This is the code of the family: khīrodakībhūtā. The whole family must live like brothers and sisters. Be an example; be ideal.

People look at you, so it is very important that your relations with each other are very cordial. People should be encouraged, inspired, seeing you. You should attract people towards Dhamma, who, until now, have had no attraction to it. And you must see that those people who have already been attracted towards Dhamma are attracted more strongly.

It is a very big responsibility. This is the time when the expansion is starting. Now it will be very rapid, there is no doubt. We are very fortunate that we have an opportunity to serve in such a good atmosphere. This is a time when there is so much unhappiness; Dhamma has to arise. It has started arising. It will grow, in spite of us, whether we are there or not. Now we have an opportunity to serve and to develop our own pāramīs.

Make use of the opportunity for your own good and for the good of others; for your own liberation and happiness, and for the liberation and happiness of others. May Dhamma grow! May the people of the world come out of their miseries! May there be peace, harmony and happiness!

Bhavatu sabba maṅgalaṃ—May all beings be happy!