MY CHOICE WAS BUDDHO MEDITATION. From the moment I made my resolve, I kept my mind from straying from the repetition of buddho. From the moment I awoke in the morning until I slept at night, I forced myself to think only of buddho. At the same time, I ceased to be preoccupied with thoughts of progress and decline: If my meditation made progress, it would do so with buddho; if it declined, it would go down with buddho. In either case, buddho was my sole preoccupation. All other concerns were irrelevant.
我选择修持念“佛陀”。从我发愿那一刻起，我就不让心离开重复持念“佛陀”。从早上醒来的那一刻到晚上睡着，我逼自己只是忆念“佛陀”。同时，我也放弃思考进步或退步：如果我的禅修进步，那它与“佛陀”一起进步；如果它退步，那它与“佛陀”一起退步。不管怎么样，“佛陀”是我唯一专注的对象，其他的一切都毫不相干。
Maintaining such single-minded concentration is not an easy task. I had to literally force my mind to remain entwined with buddho each and every moment without interruption. Regardless of whether I was seated in meditation, walking meditation or simply doing my daily chores, the word buddho resonated deeply within my mind at all times. By nature and temperament, I was always extremely resolute and uncompromising. This tendency worked to my advantage. In the end, I became so earnestly committed to the task that nothing could shake my resolve; no errant thought could separate the mind from buddho.
这样保持一心专注不是件容易的工作，每时每刻我都必须确实强迫自己的心不受干扰地安住在“佛陀”上，不管是在坐禅，经行或者只是做日常的杂务，“佛陀”这念诵一直在我内心深处共鸣。我的禀性和气质是绝对坚定和不妥协的，这种性格给我带来好处，我是那么虔诚地全心全意投入修行，决心不受任何动摇。最后，没有任何妄想可以把心和“佛陀”分开。
Working at this practice day after day, I always made certain that buddho resonated in close harmony with my present-moment awareness. Soon, I began to see the results of calm and concentration arise clearly within the citta, the mind’s essential knowing nature. At that stage, I began to see the very subtle and refined nature of the citta. The longer I internalized buddho, the more subtle the citta became, until eventually the subtlety of buddho and the subtlety of the citta melded into one another and became one and the same essence of knowing. I could not separate buddho from the citta’s subtle nature. Try as I might, I could not make the word buddho appear in my mind. Through diligence and perseverance, buddho had become so closely unified with the citta that buddho itself no longer appeared within my awareness. The mind had become so calm and still, so profoundly subtle, that nothing, not even buddho, resonated there. This meditative state is analogous to the disappearance of the breath, as mentioned above.
我每天这样修行，确保“佛陀”始终与当下的觉知和谐共鸣。很快地，我开始看到宁静与定清楚的从心——意识知道的根本特性——中生起。在这个阶段，我开始看到心非常微细精妙的本质，我越把“佛陀”内在化，心就变得越细微，直到最后“佛陀”的微细与心的微细相互融合为一体，成为能知的核心。我无法把“佛陀”从心的微细本质中分开，不管怎么尝试，我就是无法令“佛陀”这词在心中浮现。由于精进用功，“佛陀”已那么紧密地与心合一，以至“佛陀”本身不再出现在觉知中。心变得那么宁静和定，那么微细，以至没有任何东西，即使是“佛陀”，在此共鸣。这禅修的境界就类似上面提到呼吸消失的境界一样。
When this took place, I felt bewildered. I had predicated my whole practice on holding steadfastly to buddho. Now that buddho was no longer apparent, where would I focus my attention? Up to this point, buddho had been my mainstay. Now it had disappeared. No matter how hard I tried to recover this focus, it was lost. I was in a quandary. All that remained then was the citta’s profoundly subtle knowing nature, a pure and simple awareness, bright and clear. There was nothing concrete within that awareness to latch on to.
这种情况的发生，令我不知怎么办才好。在这之前我以为在整个修行中牢牢地保持着“佛陀”，现在“佛陀”不再出现，我该专注在哪儿？到此为止，“佛陀”一直是我主要的专注对象。现在它消失了，无论我多努力尝试找回这专注点，它还是不见了，我陷入困惑中。剩下的只是心那微细的能知特性，一个纯净自然的知觉，光明清晰，在这觉知中没有任何可系缘的实体。
I realized then that nothing invades the mind’s sphere of awareness when consciousness—its knowing presence—reaches such a profound and subtle condition. I was left with only one choice: With the loss of buddho, I had to focus my attention on the essential sense of awareness and knowing that was all-present and prominent at that moment. That consciousness had not disappeared; on the contrary, it was all-pervasive. All of the mindful awareness that had concentrated on the repetition of buddho was then firmly refocused on the very subtle knowing presence of the calm and converged citta. My attention remained firmly fixed on that subtle knowing essence until eventually its prominence began to fade, allowing my normal awareness to become reestablished.
我觉察到意识——知道——在达到那么高深和微细的境界时，没有任何东西可以进入心觉知的领域。我剩下唯一的选择：失去了“佛陀”，我只得把注意力放在当时无所不在而明显的觉知感上。意识没有消失，相反的，它渗透一切。之前专注在“佛陀”的觉知，现在牢牢地专注在这宁静集中的心里面极其微细的觉知上。我的注意力稳固地保留在这微细的能知核心，直到它逐渐变得不再显著，正常意识恢复过来为止。
As normal awareness returned, buddho manifested itself once more. So I immediately refocused my attention on the repetition of my meditation-word. Before long, my daily practice assumed a new rhythm: I concentrated intently on buddho until consciousness resolved into the clear, brilliant state of the mind’s essential knowing nature, remaining absorbed in that subtle knowing presence until normal awareness returned; and I then refocused with increased vigor on the repetition of buddho.
正常意识一回来，“佛陀”就再次显现，我立刻转过来专注重复持念这个念诵词。不久，我的日常修行进入一个新的节奏：我专注于“佛陀”直到意识进入心能知的特性中，一个清晰、光明的境界，接着全神专注在这微细的觉知，直到正常的意识恢复。然后我又再次更精进地重复持念“佛陀”。
It was during this stage that I first gained a solid spiritual foundation in my meditation practice. From then on, my practice progressed steadily—never again did it fall into decline. With each passing day, my mind became increasingly calm, peaceful, and concentrated. The fluctuations, that had long plagued me, ceased to be an issue. Concerns about the state of my practice were replaced by mindfulness rooted in the present moment. The intensity of this mindful presence was incompatible with thoughts of the past or future. My center of activity was the present moment—each silent repetition of buddho as it arose and passed away. I had no interest in anything else. In the end, I was convinced that the reason for my mind’s previous state of flux was the lack of mindfulness arising from not anchoring my attention with a meditation-word. Instead, I had just focused on a general feeling of inner awareness without a specific object, allowing my mind to stray easily as thoughts intruded.
我的禅修在这个阶段第一次得到稳固的修行基础。从这时起，我的修行平稳地进步——不再退堕。每过一天，我的心就更加宁静、平和、集中。那一直以来折磨我的波动，已消失无踪。对修行进展的挂念已被安住在当下的念住所取代。此当下念住的力量与妄想过去未来的妄念根本无法相比。我活动的中心是在当下——每一个重复“佛陀”的默念的生起和灭去，我对其他一切没有兴趣。最后，我坚信过去修行会波动是因为念住缺乏一个念诵词作为锚，那时我没有专门的禅修对象，只是专注于内在觉知这么一个笼统的感觉上，妄想侵入时心轻易就走失。
Once I understood the correct method for this initial stage of meditation, I applied myself to the task with such earnest commitment that I refused to allow mindfulness to lapse for even a single moment. Beginning in the morning, when I awoke, and continuing until night, when I fell asleep, I was consciously aware of my meditation at each and every moment of my waking hours. It was a difficult ordeal, requiring the utmost concentration and perseverance. I couldn’t afford to let down my guard and relax even for a moment. Being so intently concentrated on the internalization of buddho, I hardly noticed what went on around me. My normal daily interactions passed by in a blur, but buddho was always sharply in focus. My commitment to the meditation-word was total. With this firm foundation to bolster my practice, mental calm and concentration became so unshakable that they felt as solid and unyielding as a mountain.
一旦我明白禅修初阶的正确方法，我是那么诚心地投入修行，就连一瞬间的失念也不允许。从早上醒来的那刻，到晚上睡觉，我无时无刻不清醒地觉知修行。这是个严酷的考验，需要无比地专注和精进，我绝不让念住有一丝的松懈。由于那么专心深入“佛陀”，我几乎没留意身边周遭的一切。日常生活模模糊糊地过去了，可是“佛陀”则一直清晰地专注着。我对念诵词的决心是绝对的，以这个坚实的基础支撑我的修行，心宁静集中变得不可动摇，恍如山那么稳定强大。
Eventually this rock-solid condition of the mind became the primary point of focus for mindfulness. As the citta steadily gained greater inner stability, resulting in a higher degree of integration, the meditation-word buddho gradually faded from awareness, leaving the calm and concentrated state of the mind’s essential knowing nature to be perceived prominently on its own. By that stage, the mind had advanced to samadhi—an intense state of focused awareness, assuming a life of its own, independent of any meditation technique. Fully calm and unified, the knowing presence itself became the sole focus of attention, a condition of mind so prominent and powerful that nothing else can arise to dislodge it. This is known as the mind being in a state of continuous samadhi. In other words, the citta is samadhi—both are one and the same.
慢慢地这个像磐石般的心成为念住的主要专注对象。当心逐步获得内在的稳定，形成高度的合一时，念诵词“佛陀”就逐渐从觉知中淡出，剩下心知道的根本特性在宁静与定的状态下，自己凸显出来被觉知。在这个阶段，心进入三摩地——一个高度专注的觉知，独自呈现，这状态与任何禅修技巧无关。心此时的境界是完全的宁静和合一，能知显现成为唯一的专注对象，它是那么的显著和有力，以至没有其他的东西可以生起取代它。这是心持续在三摩地的境界中。换句话说，心即是三摩地——两者等同合而为一。
Speaking in terms of the deeper levels of meditation practice, a fundamental difference exists between a state of meditative calm and the samadhi state. When the mind converges and drops into a calm, concentrated state to remain for a period of time before withdrawing to normal consciousness, this is known as meditative calm. The calm and concentration are temporary conditions that last while the mind remains fixed in that peaceful state. As normal consciousness returns, these extraordinary conditions gradually dissipate. However, as the meditator becomes more adept at this practice—entering into and withdrawing from a calm, unified state over and over again—the mind begins to build a solid inner foundation. When this foundation becomes unshakable in all circumstances, the mind is known to be in a state of continuous samadhi. Then, even when the mind withdraws from meditative calm it still feels solid and compact, as though nothing can disturb its inward focus.
就更高深的禅修境界而言，定的境界与三摩地的境界有一个根本的分别。当心集中落入宁静、定的境界一段时间，然后退出来回到正常的意识状态，这是定境。它的宁静和定只是暂时维持在心进入这个定境的期间内。心恢复平常状态，这个特殊的境界就渐渐消散。不过，当禅修者越来越熟练于修行——一次又一次地进出这宁静和定的境界——心就会建立起坚固的内在基础。这个基础变得在任何情况之下都不动摇时，心就被称为进入持续三摩地的境界。这时，即使心从这个定境退出来，它仍然感到稳固紧密，仿佛没有任何东西可扰乱它的内在焦点。
The citta that is continuously unified in samadhi is always even and unperturbed. It feels completely satiated. Because of the very compact and concentrated sense of inner unity, everyday thoughts and emotions no longer make an impact. In such a state, the mind has no desire to think about anything. Completely peaceful and contented within itself, nothing is felt to be lacking.
持续集中在三摩地的心会保持平等和不动摇，它感到彻底的充实。这是由于内在的结合有种非常紧密集中的感觉，日常的思想和情绪不再带来冲击。在这个境界，心不再妄想任何东西。它自己彻底的平静和满足，无所匮乏。
In such a state of continuous calm and concentration, the citta becomes very powerful. While the mind was previously hungry to experience thoughts and emotions, it now shuns them as a nuisance. Before it was so agitated that it couldn’t stop thinking and imagining even if it wanted to. Now, with samadhi as its habitual condition, the mind feels no desire to think about anything. It views thought as an unwanted disturbance. When the mind’s essential knowing presence stands out prominently all the time, the citta is so inwardly concentrated that it tolerates no disturbance. Because of this sublime tranquility—and the tendency of samadhi to lull the mind into this state of serene satisfaction—those whose minds have attained continuous samadhi tend to become strongly attached to it. It remains so until one reaches the level of practice where wisdom prevails, and the results become even more satisfying.
在这持续宁静和定的境界中，心变得非常有力。这之前它渴望的思想和情绪，现在则视之为令人讨厌的东西而回避之，以前它为了停止思考和想象而烦恼，现在当三摩地已成了惯性，它提不起兴趣思考任何东西，它视念头为不受欢迎的干扰。当意识知道的主要特性一直都那么明显时，心就极度往内专注，不能忍受任何干扰。由于这甚深的宁静——以及三摩地令心平静进入安详的满足的趋向——那些证得持续三摩地的人倾向于强烈执着于这境界。禅者会一直停留在这个阶段，直到智慧超越它，之后效果就会更理想。
