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弟子规浅释 Standards for Students 第三章﹕悌 Chapter Three﹕ FRATERNITY - 1
 
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第三章:悌

Chapter Three: FRATERNITY

兄道友,弟道恭,兄弟睦,孝在中。
财物轻,怨何生,言语忍,忿自泯。
或饮食,或坐走,长者先,幼者后。
长呼人,即代叫,人不在,己先到。
称尊长,勿呼名,对尊长,勿见能。
路遇长,疾趋揖,长无言,退恭立。
骑下马,乘下车,过犹待,百步余。
长者立,幼勿坐,长者坐,命乃坐。
尊长前,声要低,低不闻,却非宜。
事诸父,如事父,事诸兄,如事兄。

xiong

dao

you

 

di

dao

gong

做哥哥

原则

友爱

 

做弟弟

原则

恭敬顺从

to be an older brother

the way

to be kind to

to be a younger brother

the way

to be respectful

做为兄长要友爱,身为弟弟须恭顺;
The way of an older brother should be gentle, just as younger brother should be respectful.

xiong

di

mu

 

xiao

zai

zhong

哥哥

弟弟

和睦

 

孝道

存在

里面

older brother

younger brother

to be harmonious

filial piety

to be exist

in it

兄弟和睦相处,孝道自然存乎其中。
If brothers and sisters get along harmoniously, then it is clear they know how to be filial.


有一首诗说:

There’s a verse that goes,

同气连枝各自荣,
些些言语莫伤情;
一回相见一回老,
能得几时为弟兄。

Born of the same energy,
we are connected branches that grow separately.
Why bicker and hurt each other’s feelings?
Each time we see each other, we are older.
How much time left do we have as siblings?

这意思是兄弟源于同一父母,就像一棵树的枝干,虽然各自生长,到底还是同一个根;千万不要为了几句话,而互相伤了感情。为什么呢?因为韶光易逝,一忽儿就各自成家立业,相见也就不容易了;每一回见面,更由不得你不心惊;对方比上一回又见老了!人生短短几十年,究竟有多长的时间能做兄弟呢?少小不相亲睦,长大见面就吵;到了发白面皱,难道还有力气再打架?等到先后离世,难道还把怨恨带到九泉之下去算?古人说:“同船共渡,要修五百年。”何况是做兄弟姐妹?想想看,这可不是个小因缘啊!世间人伦,肇始于夫妇,然后纵的发展出父子,横的敷演成兄弟;自此以至于九族,都源本于这三种亲属关系,所以才叫做“至亲 ”,怎么可以不亲厚和睦呢?

Brothers and sisters were born from the same parents. They are like the branches of a tree: Although they grow up separately, they originally come form the same root. We should never bicker and hurt each other’s feelings. Why not? Because time flies. Pretty soon we will have our own families and careers, and we’ll hardly get a chance to see each other. Every time we meet, we will be shocked to see that the other has gotten older. Human life only lasts a few short decades; how much longer will we have each other as siblings? If we don’t get along when we’re still young, then after we grow up we will bicker whenever we meet. But will we still have the strength to fight when we have wrinkles and gray hair? When we die, will we bring our grudges to the underworld? There’s an ancient saying: "The affinity of riding in the same boat with someone took five hundred years to develop." How much more time it must take to develop the affinity to be someone’s brother or sister? Think about it: these are not minor conditions! All human relationships begin with that of husband and wife; then there is the vertical relationship of parent to child, and the horizontal relationship between siblings. These three basic relationships, which give rise to the nine generations of relatives, are considered one’s closest kin. How can we not he affectionate and close to them?

中国人把兄弟姐妹叫做“同胞”、“手足”,意思也就是强调这份情谊的贵重和不可分割。做父母的总把孩子们比喻成手指,虽然五指有长有短,却根根连心,咬了哪 一根都一样痛;虽然孩子有贤愚肖不肖,就像手心手背,终归是同一只手。所以孩子们若有贫富贵贱之别,就算发达的那个用锦衣美食来孝养,做父母的还是会惦挂着落魄的那个 ,难以真正开心;孩子们若再互相残害,那做父母的就更不会安心了!所以懂得孝道真谛的,一定亲厚自己的兄弟姐妹,绝不相争;甚至在自己发达时,也不忘提拔照顾自己的兄弟姐妹,绝不相忘。

The Chinese refer to brothers and sisters as "those of the same womb" and "hands and feet," emphasizing how important and inseparable our siblings are to us. Parents often compare their children to the fingers of a hand. Although the fingers are of different lengths, they are all connected at the base, and it hurts the same no matter which one is bitten. Children may be wise or foolish, filial or unfilial, but they are just like the palm and the back of the hand, which are part of the same hand. One child maybe wealthy and honored, while another is poor and lowly, but even though the wealthy one provides his parents with fine clothing and food, his parents can hardly feel happy in their anxiety over the less fortunate one. And if the children mutually hurt each other, how much the less could the parents be happy. A child who truly understands how to be filial is kind and affectionate to his siblings and would never quarrel with them. If such a child is successful in life, he/she will not forget to help out and lake care of his siblings.

汉末三国,魏王曹操因为宠爱天资聪颖的三子曹植,几次想让他取代长子曹丕的世子位置;等曹丕继承王位,又废汉称帝,就无时不刻想害死曹植了。他的母亲虽贵为皇太后,却是每天提心吊胆,不能安枕。后来曹丕把弟弟贬谪远地,曹植进朝辞行时,曹丕就故意刁难他,限他七步成诗,想藉机杀了他。没想到曹植竟在走七步路的短时间内,吟成了这首有名的七步诗:

During the Three Kingdoms Period (end of Han Dynasty, c. 241 -277 A.D.) the King of the state of Wei, Cao Cao, tried several times to let his favorite third son, Cao Zhi, inherit the throne in place of his eldest son, the crown prince Cao Pi. When Cao Pi assumed the throne, he removed the Han emperor and became the emperor himself and plotted constantly to kill Cao Zhi. Although his mother was the Empress Dowager, she was so nervous about this that she could never sleep in peace. Finally Cao Pi banished his younger brother to a distant land. When Cao Zhi went to court to bid farewell. Cao Pi deliberately challenged him to compose a poem in seven steps; if his brother failed, he would use it as a pretext to execute him. Unexpectedly, in the short time it took to walk seven steps, Cao Zhi chanted this famous "Seven-step Poem":

煮豆燃豆箕,豆在釜中泣;
本是同根生,相煎何太急?

The beans are being cooked Over a fire of bean stalks.
From within the pot, the beans cry out:
"We both came from the same root;
Aren’t we being too hasty in torturing each other?

他说,我好比那热锅里被煮的豆子,而用来生火煮我的,却是哥哥你这同根生长的豆梗;哥哥啊!你为什么这么样迫害我呢?这时一直紧张地躲在后面偷看的太后,忍不住跑出来,抱住曹植哭得死去活来,曹丕也掉下了泪,放曹植远去了。

"Cao Zhi’s meaning was, "I am like some beans being cooked in a pot, and the fuel that is used for the fire to cook me is you, my brother--the bean stalks that grew from the same root. Brother, why do you want to do me in?" Al that point, the Empress Dowager, who had been watching secretly, couldn’t bear it any longer. She ran out, hugged Cao Zhi. and cried for dear life. Cao Pi shed tears, too, and bid farewell to Cao Zhi.

古人说:“帝王之家无亲情。”为了权力地位,甚至父子相残;兄弟相杀,就更不计其数,但也不是没有例外的。舜帝所以被称为大孝,就因为他对屡次要害死自己的父亲和继母,不但是始终尽孝不渝;对做帮凶的后弟,更不究既往,封予爵禄。这就是真正能体会亲心的孝子!

An ancient saying goes, "There are no bonds of kinship in the imperial family." Countless times the desire for power and position pitted father against son, or led brothers to kill one another. However, there have been exceptions. Emperor Shun became known as a greatly filial son because he remained ever filial to his father and stepmother even though they plotted his death many times. As for his stepbrother who was their accomplice, Shun didn’t hold it against him and even bestowed nobility and benefits upon him. This was a filial son who truly understood his parents’ hearts.

又唐玄宗还是皇子时,因为他英武而立有大功,他的长兄就把太子位让给他。唐玄宗即皇位后,就把他做皇子时住的地方加以整修,又盖了楼,题为“花萼相辉”;另在四周建造五座宫殿,分赐给他四个亲兄弟和一个堂弟,号称“五王宅”。意思是一登此楼,就可望见五王宅,好像花萼与花一样相辉映。

Another example is Emperor Xuanzong of the Tang Dynasty. Since he had earned great merit in battle as a prince, his eldest brother yielded the position of crown prince to him. After he assumed the throne, he renovated the residence he had used when he was a prince, building a tower which he called "The Mutual Shining of Flower and Calyx" there. On the four sides he built five palaces which he conferred upon his four brothers and a cousin. He called them "The Houses of the Five Kings." If one climbed to the top of the tower, one could see the five king’s houses; it was just like the calyx and the flower mutually illumining each other.

唐玄宗常和兄弟同游猎,在玩耍时,彼此只行家人礼,从不摆皇帝架子。任何一个兄弟生病,他必寝食不安,殷勤探问;有一次为了替幼弟煎药,还不小心烧着了胡须。最为人所津津乐道的是“花萼被”和“花萼床”--他特地打了一床六人长枕和大被,并造了一张六人大床,以便和他的兄弟抵足而眠。所以后来的人,就用“花萼”来比喻兄弟的友爱。

Emperor Xuanzong often went hunting with his brothers, and during those playful times, the brothers followed the family etiquette among themselves; the Emperor never put on airs. If any one of his brothers got sick, he would not be able to eat or sleep in peace, and would constantly inquire after him. Once when he was boiling medicinal herbs for his little brother, he even burned his beard by accident. The things people like to tell about most are his "Flower and Calyx Blanket" and "Flower and Calyx Bed"-he had a long pillow, large blanket, and large six-person bed custom-made so that he and his brothers could sleep under the same covers. That’s why the term "flower and calyx" has come to be used to refer to brotherly affection.

古时候的家庭,孩子幼小时,父母是左手提抱一个、右手牵携一个这样地带着;孩子则是一个抓父母前襟,一个拉父母后裾的跟着。吃饭共一张桌子,衣服也兄弟相传,有的还同枕共被一床眠;所以纵使孩子有贤愚肖不肖之别,大抵上感情都还亲厚;到了各自婚嫁,插入了来自不同家庭背景的新成员,就容易有嫌隙;这时,个人品德的好坏,就很分明地比出来了!大抵而言,小时就着重兄友弟恭的家庭里,仍是比较经得起考验的。

In the families of ancient times, parents would carry a child in one arm and hold another by the hand; and the children would hang onto their parents’ lapel or the hem of their robe. They would sit down at one long table for meals, and clothing would be handed down form older siblings to younger ones. Siblings even slept under the same covers and shared the same pillow sometimes! And so even if some might be smarter or more obedient than others, in general they were all very close. When they got married and new members joined the family, there tended to be some discord. At that point, each person’s moral calibre would become apparent. In general, families in which siblings were taught to show respect and affection for one another had an easier time of it.

现在的家庭孩子少了,“个人主义”又方兴未艾;莫说独生的不知孝友为何物,就有一两个兄弟姐妹的,也都自小各行其是,毫无礼让容忍或与人分享的概念。一个家庭可以有三、四种不同的生活方式,美其名曰“自由”、“进步”;殊不知那已是在开倒车,回到没有法纪和伦理的原始社会上。恢复旧道德,真是刻不容缓呀!

In modern families where there are fewer children, individualism is on the rise. Not only do those who are "the only child" have no idea of what filial piety and brotherly affection are, even those with several siblings still do their own thing ever since they are little; they don’t understand what it means to yield to, to accept, or to share with others. In a single family there might even be people leading three or four different kinds of lifestyles. People call this "freedom" and "progress"; little do they know that we are actually regressing to the state of primitive societies that had no laws or ethics. There is no time to be lose: let us quickly return to our old moral and ethical values!


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