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To the Last Breath - 5. Letting Go (Magha Puja Day)
 
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5. Letting Go (Magha Puja Day)

Today is Magha Puja1 day. It's the day when the Lord Buddha declared his intention to let go of the conditioned state, bidding goodbye to the world and to the prison of the cycle of birth and death. He chose to relinquish and discard his body after having carried it for eighty years, and throughout that period it had always been an oppressive load to bear.

But then, such is the nature of this body. Other things, in contrast, have their times of heaviness and lightness, occasionally allowing us to catch a breath. Carrying food and water (for example) are heavy when we first shoulder them but become progressively lighter as we steadily use them up. Yet we have been bearing the load of our body since birth and it never seems to get any lighter. It's always heavy. In fact, as we advance in years and decline in strength, it seems increasingly heavy. That is why the Lord Buddha asserted that:

"These five aggregates are an extremely heavy burden."2

Apart from shouldering the heavy load of this form or body, there is also painful feeling and the rest of the aggregates. They are not only heavy and oppressive but also have razor sharp barbs that pierce through our body and heart.

The Lord Buddha put up with this until he was eighty years old. To put it simply, he must have said:

"Ah! This body is beyond bearing. It's time to leave it."

Thus he declared that, in three months time he would relinquish his life and lay down the burden. He made the decision on the full moon day of the third lunar month.

On that very same day, twelve hundred and fifty noble disciples3 assembled, spontaneously and without invitation, each coming through his own initiative. The Lord Buddha therefore presented this teaching to the arahant disciples, delighting them with the bliss of the Buddha-dhamma. The gathering thus became the Pure Assembly.4 Here is a brief outline of what was said on that day:

"Sabbapaapassa akara.na.m, The not-doing of all evils,

kusalass'uupasa.mpadaa, The doing of what is good,

Sacitta pariyodapana.m, The purifying of one's own heart:

eta.m Buddhaanasaasana.m. This is the Teaching of the Buddhas.

Anuupavaado anuupaghaato Not insulting, not harming,

paa.timokkhe ca sa.mvaro Restraint according to the Patimokkha,

Mattanyutaa ca bhattasmi.m Moderation in taking food,

pantanyca sayanaasana.m Having a secluded place,

Adhicitte ca aayogo, Intent on the pure heart:

eta.m Buddhaanasaasana.m. This is the Teaching of the Buddhas."

The Buddha gave this teaching5 to the twelve hundred and fifty as a form of diversion on that afternoon, which accords with today. For those arahants, it was more of an enjoyment than an exhortation because they were already pure, no longer needing instruction to cleanse the defilements from their hearts. That is why they were called the Pure Assembly. This was a unique event in the Buddha's teaching life, never again were 1250 arahant disciples to gather-and be offered such teaching.

We celebrate the Buddhas and arahants because of their prodigious and brilliant nature. They were figures of wonder among the majority of people because the worldly people's hearts remain corrupted by the staining defilements — not one of them could compare with the spotless arahants.

"Sabbapaapassa akara.na.m": to refrain from unwholesome, down-casting actions that give rise to all kinds of suffering. It's this base side of the heart that is so critically important. Depraved actions and speech have natural limitations but the depravity of the heart, which depresses and down-casts itself, is propelled by our own continuous thinking and imagining. It's these agents that drive the heart into gloom and dark depression that are exactly the things in the heart that are already murky and defiled. The Lord Buddha named them 'defilements'. They are those factors that manoeuvre and instigate memory and thought processes into action. While another sort of defilement causes the heart to become gloomy and disconsolate.

Wrongdoing and base deeds don't just refer to robbery, looting and plundering. That's evil on a gross level but we manage continually to generate similar depravities on the intermediate and more subtle level. This is equivalent to constantly depressing our own heart. This downcast heart will continue to be cast down wherever we may go because we are also generating depression for the heart. Walking, standing, sitting, lying down — the heart is always concocting and contriving and thus becoming miserable in every posture. One aspect of the Lord Buddha's teaching therefore is his emphasizing that we shouldn't indulge in creating gloom and misery for ourselves.

What method can we find to avoid this depression?

"Kusalass' uupasampadaa": wisdom must be sufficiently developed to remedy this depression by cleaning out the gloom-makers and the base evils, we will then have:

"Sacitta pariyodapana.m": a bright and cheerful heart. When our cleverness, which is mindfulness and wisdom, has cleaned out all the filth and gloom from the heart, it becomes bright and clear — "sacitta pariyodapana.m".

The evil, whether great or small, will then start to wane as our heart becomes pure. The Teaching of all the Buddhas is like this. They all say: "Do it this way. There's no alternative."

Any alternative, easier way would have been known to the wisest of all, the Lord Buddha. He might have woven us all a hammock to lounge in, while we steadily swatted at and ridded ourselves of defilements. This might seem to accord with his fame as a teacher full of love and compassion, to a world full of frail and grumbling beings. In fact, the Lord Buddha had already used all his skill and ability in establishing the shortest and most direct path.

Each of the Buddhas had to cultivate the perfections6 before realizing Buddhahood. They used the Dhamma in their hearts to drive out the defilements, and then taught this as the true and correct way. They tested and selected with the maximum power of their minds before discovering and teaching the Dhamma, which is most suitable for all living beings.

Suitable here does not mean that it fits in with people's own fancies, but rather that it points to a practice appropriate to overcoming their defilements. This is Dhamma. Nothing else can surpass the Middle Way of practice as passed on from the Lord Buddha. The defilements fear no other means, methods or dhammas. Nothing else can eject them from the heart, or even scratch their skins.

"Anuupavaado": Don't slander other people.

"Anuupaghaato": Don't harm or kill human beings or animals.

"Paa.timokkhe ca sa.mvaro": Keep your behavior within the bounds of Dhamma, for this is the means of uprooting the defilements.

"Mattanyutaa ca bhattasmi.m": Know the right measure in using food, and live simply and frugally. Don't indulge and exceed what is reasonable for one who practices. Know the right amount in whatever you're involved with.

"Pantanyca sayanaasana.m": Look for seclusion, and use this solitude to deal with the defilements.

"Adhicitte ca aayogo": Develop the heart to excel in Dhamma, employing mindfulness and wisdom, step by step.

("Eta.m Buddhaanasaasana.m":) This is the essence of the Teaching of all the Buddhas.

This was the Dhamma with which the Lord Buddha delighted all the noble disciples. To those who were not yet arahant, he also taught "sabbapaapassa akarana.m". It is an essential practice, being the only way we can hope to use gradually to drive the defilements from our heart. Yet, do we truly take it to heart? Or is it rather that hammock hanging over there, that takes our fancy?

The essence of the pure Dhamma, imparted by each Buddha, is directly drawn from each of their hearts. But do we receive it into ours? The Lord Buddha bequeathed it with his great compassion. But do we receive it with full devotion and trust? With total mind and heart? If we merely feign acceptance of the Dhamma and later come to discard it, then it will all have been worthless. It would, in fact, have gone against the Lord Buddha's original intention.

The Lord Buddha decided to relinquish the body on the full moon of the sixth lunar month, and made the announcement to that effect on the third month's full moon — which is today. From that moment on, the constraints and irritations of the elements and aggregates would vanish. This is the complete passing away without remainder,7 with no more concerns or obligations to any worldly condition. This is the Dhamma transcending the world. The ultimate Dhamma.

'World' is the whole gamut of suppositions and assumptions existing in this world — the three worlds are the worlds of supposition8 and change, the worlds governed by impermanence, suffering and not-self. Whatever one's birth or state, these three marks spin that world with confusion, and no one can bar their course. But once one has got beyond them, all concerns come to an end:

"Nicchato parinibbuto": craving totally ends, mundane suppositions are gone. It is out of this Dhamma that all the truths taught by the Lord Buddha resound. If we take this Dhamma deeply to heart in our practice, then it will 'ring and roar' in our heart. At first, it will resonate in a cool, calm and peaceful condition of heart — which are the various levels of samadhi. Then, it will reverberate with wisdom in our thinking and analysis, so that we can steadily free ourselves. Finally, it will resound in the pure9 state of complete freedom. There!

"Nicchato parinibutto": craving is totally extinguished. The source of those cravings was defilement of every sort, because it is never sated or satisfied.

"Natthi ta.nhaa samaa nadii": the waters of river and ocean can't equal the defilement-inspired craving. They perpetually engulf the hearts of sentient beings and never run out.

How can we dry up these waters? We must bail them out using the energy of the one who practices until they eventually ebb and diminish. Draining and drawing out every day, examining every day, understanding and thereby relinquishing every day. The waters will then start to seem not quite so great. They are really only as large as our aggregates, that's all.

But for the heart that is attached to the aggregates, this is a weighty matter. The heart doesn't bother with any piece of land, instead it comes and seizes hold right here. This is the big issue, the hot and heavy concern. This is where the defilements scorch the heart as no other fire can, endlessly turning up the heat.

We have all heard about floods. When our lungs are flooded and congested, the doctor can drain them. But when the defilements, complete with craving, engulf the heart, what are we going to use to draw them off? We can only bring in faith, energy, mindfulness and wisdom. Thus, we must probe, examine and investigate to see things clearly, as they really are. What is being clung to? About what are false assumptions being made? And why is it that the voice of Dhamma, the aid in drawing-out, is never listened to?

The defilements usually try to play smart with the Buddha. They are his adversary and must always assert their cleverness against the Dhamma and contend with it. Grasping is the defilement's line while correcting and uprooting is the way of Dhamma. Extracting defilements with wisdom is Dhamma, and transcending them and arriving at serene happiness is the Nibbana Dhamma, or the Pure Dhamma.10 There is always this rivalry.

Keep on trying! Don't lose out to these things, for you now have entered the boxing ring and must determine to be the champion. Fight without backing down. You'll have to be dead before you'll allow yourself to be carried out of the ring. If you've been floored but still live and can return to the fight, then battle on. If you can't manage to fight on anymore, then you can always denounce and curse them right there in the ring. What harm can that do? We are fighters and if we can no longer fight the defilements, then curse every mother and father of them. This is our single remaining weapon. We are down and cannot punch back, yet we still have a mouth. We can still talk, scold and curse even though we are knocked down.

Of course, this is only an analogy. To be a warrior doesn't mean that we go round cursing or abusing anyone, but rather that we combat the defilements. We must fight to the extent befitting a disciple of the Tathagata,11 who was himself of the warrior class.

Have you ever noticed how our teachers and venerable acharns practiced? These meditation masters, whom we respect so deeply, were all warriors in this way. If that's how they themselves triumphed, why should they teach us to go in a different direction?

Alright then. Keep switching and varying your probe, using wisdom to stay on top of the events within. This wisdom is of such sharp discernment that it will be able to find a way to draw us out of the deep mire of elements and aggregates in which we've been stuck and buried for countless eons. Ultimately, we end up with the heart, and even here we have to pull everything out. The 'I' must be extracted from form, from the body and from the elements of earth, water, air, and fire. We must pull the heart out of the painful feeling that we have taken on as ourself. The way to withdraw from form is simply to let go of the very form that we have grasped as self. We pull away from grasping each of the aggregates that we have taken as 'me' and 'mine'. Use wisdom to try and root-out, right here, keeping pace with whatever's going on.

The heart is subtle and extraordinary. The body, in contrast, is nothing special — however much we uphold and cling to it in our delusion. It can only be our utter stupidity that leads us so readily to shoulder this gross thing, without ever wanting to put it down. If we were really smart and considered what's behind it all, we would let it go. Why carry it? Probe and investigate these questions using mindfulness and wisdom that are available.

There's no need to go and be so afraid of dying. Fear itself is just another defilement. Why build up defilements by being frightened? We must rather build up our courage because this is a quality that counters the defilements. Bring it out to fight the defilements and to find out what actually dies. In fact, nothing dies. And the defilements are always lying to us about it. The moment we are unguarded, they instantly insinuate themselves and whisper: "When will I die... today?... tomorrow?... here?... or over there?... I'm going to die very soon." We upset ourselves with such thinking, while the elements just exist, indifferently. In this way we complicate matters and confuse ourselves by thinking that we are responsible. What sort of responsibility is this? It's more a matter of self-confusion than self-responsibility.

If we are to be truly self-responsible and self-reliant, then our heart will need full mindfulness and wisdom to use for investigation and rooting out. It must be able to probe and extract from the heart all the anxieties and confusions about living, about death and sickness — and whatever else is found there. There can be no easing off or allowing the defilements in to fool us. One can then say that those who practice in this way are truly being responsible for themselves. By investigating everything, both close in and all around, you will come to realize the true situation and be able to free the heart. Then there's contentment and relief. Contentment is found right here. Success and correctly assumed responsibility are also right here.

We hear news reports that so and so is an arahant — as in the case of those 1250 arahants — or that that person is a stream-enterer, once-returner or nonreturner. But what about ourselves? Our news is only about weakness, discouragement, depression, stupidity, dejection and confusion. This is our whole story. Doesn't it run contrary to the reports about those others?

Our personal news is exactly the opposite of those who possess the Ariyan Treasure, the Dhamma Wealth in their hearts. If our news only measures up to this, then it can only be concerned with the thousand-and-one kinds of suffering. It's more like 'sinking in the mud'. The unwanted news makes up our account, and because we create this story we must also bear the result.

Who is Dhamma intended for? Who is it taught for? Who makes up the Buddhist Community — if we can't be counted as members. Surely the Dhamma was taught and intended for us. Then what are we taught to overcome? Do we have the means for this purpose? Yes, they are right here — it's as if the Lord Buddha is right here before our very eyes, pointing them out to us. This isn't something about long ago or far away. It's fresh and vibrant right here. The Dhamma of the Lord Buddha exists here with us now, so why go elsewhere with all your worthless speculations?

"The Buddha realized Nibbana in a distant time and place. He taught the Dhamma long ago and it has become stale and insipid. Its flavor can't last up until today."

There! Listen to that! The defilements lie to us — can't we hear them? Beware of Maara12 whose fabrications will destroy us with such ideas, mashing us to pulp. The Truth has no time or era and is there with everyone who is searching for it. How can Dhamma ever vanish with time? How can we kill the truth with these ideas, needlessly bringing utter ruin to ourselves?

Who in this world can know better than the Lord Buddha? The Buddha, Dhamma and Sangha always stand challenging the defilements in the arena of truth. This is something timeless.13 Therefore virtue, concentration and wisdom are never outmoded or behind the times. They're independent of period or place — and yet are within everyone. They can be produced at anytime, and whenever developed they grow and thrive. This is the way leading to the Path, Fruit and Nibbaana; which is timeless and independent of place. While the defilements for their part also manage a continued presence within the hearts of sentient beings.

We all now, as in the Buddha's time, have defilements. The overcoming of these defilements must still be done with the same old virtue, concentration, wisdom, faith and effort. How can this be kept far away and long ago from us? It cannot. We will all be able to go beyond suffering by rectifying the situation at the right spot and in the right way. Expose whatever is cloaking the heart by focusing with wisdom and mindfulness on whatever is dark and obscure, taking that spot as the target for investigation. Where exactly is this sadness and gloom? It's a condition of the heart that we can perceive, just as we know when darkness or light contacts our eyes. We notice that darkness is dark, but the one who knows is not also in the dark. Light is known; darkness is known; any amount of darkness can be known within our heart. And gloom and depression are also known together with brightness and cheerfulness.

The one who knows, knows in this way. We must make wisdom penetrate further, taking the heart or these things as its target. When sadness and gloom appear within the heart, don't be alarmed, or glad or regretful. Look on them as mental conditions that must be investigated, as things that arise and cease. They're not of the heart but simply depend on it to appear and then hook into it. Persevere with the examination but don't get excited or unsettled with the objects themselves. Whatever arises and passes through — that we must know. Then we can be counted as being one who takes up the study and practice. We have to study until we know through wisdom and can understand those things that appear within ourselves. This true knowingness has no ups and downs. It is never like that. A condition arises and the one who practices recognizes it as such.

When all these conditions end, so does any concern about them. All that is left is the consummate state of purity. Our investigations depended on the continual encountering with such conditions in the heart. If they were around they would need to declare their existence, so that it's always possible to know the true state of affairs. Therefore, if we want the truth, we must look for and investigate the feelings that arise, and similarly with any sadness or cheerfulness, any happiness or suffering that appear. Such is the way of one who knows with all-round wisdom, being aware of any condition that resides with the heart. There is only this one place where we can finish off our studies.

They talk of graduating with a Bachelor degree or a Masters' or Doctorate; or of passing the various exams of Paali language study, following the popular convention of the time. Throughout the ages people with defilements have always had to rely on customs and observances and these are numerous beyond description. The ways of Dhamma though always remain current because their nature is constant and immutable.

You can have as many grades and degrees as you like — level fifteen or level thirty14... But I wonder if defilements bother with such things. They just have a great time, singing away there on top of people's hearts. Since when were they meeker and more humble than people? They wield greater power than people — stupid people, that is. Intelligent people are able to crush and destroy them and this is the way to gain our knowledge and qualification.

Our Bachelor's degree of virtue, samadhi and wisdom is all around us — better to take this B.A.. Then on to the Masters' and the premier 'Ek' grade so that we have 'one heart, One Dhamma'. But this isn't the preeminence of someone with only one eye, who is already nearly blind. Don't be foremost in that way.15

The true preeminence of the Lord Buddha is 'one heart One Dhamma'. Study up to this Ph.D. by having all-round knowledge to the highest degree, replacing our ignorance with knowledge about ourselves. Inspect, using wisdom to probe and clear-up, until reaching the Highest Dhamma level, or the genuine Dhamma, which are the same. 'The heart and Dhamma are one and the same!'

"Buddha.m, Dhamma.m, Sangha.m sara.na.m gacchaami" — finding refuge in Buddha, Dhamma and Sangha falls completely within this One Dhamma.

"Dhammo padiipo" — the radiance of Dhamma always shining brightly. This is the genuine Dhamma. It is timeless and unconditioned... the true Dhamma.

Alright then — build the Buddha, Dhamma and Sangha right here within the heart:

"Buddha.m, Dhamma.m, Sangha.m sara.na.m gacchaami. We go for refuge to the Buddha, Dhamma and Sangha."

More precisely, we arrive at the Buddha, Dhamma, Sangha in the purity inside the heart, for this is the coming together of all three refuges. See them clearly within the heart and make yourself a refuge within. This is the complete "attaahi attano naatho": 'We are our own refuge, not needing to depend on anything else.'

As is the Buddha so is Dhamma and Sangha. Buddha Dhamma Sangha are the same. When one has reached this stage there's no need to go out seeking to pay respects to the Lord Buddha, for we can now offer this purity of heart — the whole Dhamma of this purity — as our puja-offering to him. Nothing else intermeshes and fits together as well. As is the Buddha of the Lord Buddha so is the Buddha of us. As is that Dhamma, so this Dhamma here. Without doubt, they are all one and the same.

Did the Lord Buddha finally pass away16 so long ago? We no longer ask, because this concerns the conditioned state of elements, the body and aggregates. The Lord merely let go of his aggregates, at a certain time, in a certain year and place. The Noble Disciples were just the same. Were they all completely annihilated after they passed away? Is it really like that? This is the view of empty, worthless men and women; the truth is otherwise. The real Dhamma is that of supreme happiness,17 which endorses and confirms the fruit of that purity.

What is Sangho? It is the one who upholds the state of purity. This is the true sangho and is found within ourselves: "Attaahi attano naatho" — 'oneself is one's own protector'. The vital point is to make this refuge sufficiently secure, for it's imperative that the heart frees itself from all dangers and attains to deliverance. Whatever is worth attaining is worth striving for. Go for it right here.

Don't upset yourself over anything at all. Nothing really matters in this world. It's just that our heart goes and gets involved. We actually go looking for affairs to indulge our-self in, and this needs cutting away with mindfulness and wisdom.

Wherever we are, we are always alone. We are born alone. When illness comes, it isn't the assembled relatives that are in pain. When we die, we die alone — nobody else can die in our place or deputize for our distress. Therefore, we must help ourselves — Attaahi attano naatho — using our own mindfulness and wisdom. This is the right and most fitting response.

The Lord Buddha decided to let go of his life on this same full moon day. For us today, we should resolve to abandon craving and defilements. These are the essential things that one must be rid of.

As far as dying is concerned, the Lord Buddha said it wasn't important which day we die on. Whenever the breath runs out, that is the day we die. The only criterion is our last breath. If there's still breath, then we haven't yet died. So we keep on breathing... which in itself is no great problem. It's really just about a lot of wind.

The important point is the founding of a base and the putting ourselves on alert — all for the sake of our heart. "Attaahi attano naatho": 'oneself is one's own protector'. When this is accomplished then there is contentment in living or dying, wherever and whenever it might take place. No more problems remain, for they were only concerned with mundane conditions.

That's it for this talk on Dhamma. I think it's suitable to stop here.

Notes

1. Maagha Puuja is the national holiday in Thailand dedicated to the Sangha Jewel. (Visaakha Puuja in May and AAsaalha Puuja in July are for the Buddha and Dhamma.)

2. "bhaaraa have panyca khandhaa"

3. ariya saavakaa

4. Visuddhi Uposatha

5. Dhammapada, vv: 183 and 185

6. paaramii

7. anupaadisesa-nibbaana.

8. sammuti

9. visuddhi

10. Visuddhi Dhamma

11. See Glossary.

12. Maara usually personified as the Evil One, or tempter. And here referring to misleading, evil thoughts.

13. akaaliko

14. Pali language is examined in just nine grades.

15. A play on the word ek or eka, which in Thai can mean: 'highest' or 'first' (as in Ph.D.); 'one' or 'singular' (as in 'one eye' and 'One Dhamma') so eka-grade, eka-eye, and Eka Dhamma.

16. parinibbaana

17. parama.m sukha.m


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