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77.猪圈里的妇人 Ladies In The Pigpen
 
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77.LADIES IN THE PIGPEN

  The capital of Anhui province has a funny name: Hefei. That means Together Fat.

  Nearby, in Paitou Village, Xuan 4 was a hog butcher with over twenty years' experience. He had made a lot of money in this business, and saved it carefully, so he owned three houses. He lived in one and rented out the other two.He also owned a hundred acres of good crop land.

  In other words, he really had enough money to retire and take it easy. But few people know when they've had enough. As a matter of fact, Xuan was so used to killing hogs that he felt something was wrong if he let a day go by without killing something. On holidays, he kept himself busy sharpening his knives.

  He got up early one morning as usual to begin his day's work. His wife went into the outhouse, which in old houses was always right next to the pigpen. She happened to look in, and let out a scream that brought her husband running.

  "What's wrong? What's wrong?"

  "I looked into the pigpen, and I saw two ladies lying there, not pigs! I thought I must be imagining things, so I rubbed my eyes and looked again, and sure enough, two ladies it was!

  "I think this is an omen, dear. Please, don't kill any more pigs!"

  "Ha, ha, ha!" Xuan 4 laughed. "You sure have a strange sense of humor! You just hadn't got the sleep out of your eyes!"

  Mrs. Xuan saw he wasn't going to take her advice, so she grabbed his knife and threw it down the toilet, straight into the cesspool. Uh! Xuan 4 didn't kill any pigs that day, but he went out shopping for a new knife.

  The next day Mrs. Xuan asked her parents to come talk with her husband. "Look, you already have more than enough money to see you through the rest of your life. Why don't you just listen to your wife and take it easy?"

  "But it's my job to kill hogs."

  "If you can't stop it, our daughter is going to move out."

  Xuan thought back on all their years of married life together, and all the money he made killing hogs.

  "I guess she'll have to move out."

  Xuan gave his ex-wife half of their property, and she got custody of their child. When everything was settled, Xuan went back to work, and slaughtered those pigs in the pen, the ones his wife had thought were ladies.

  He slaughtered their piglets, too, and just as he finished, someone came running up with the message that his child had suddenly dropped dead.

  Xuan was remorseful, but he was too stubborn to admit he had been wrong. He started gambling to take his mind off his cares. In a short time, all the local gamblers knew that when Xuan came to the table, their pockets would be filled up, because every time he gambled, he lost.

  Before long, he had gambled away all of the property he had left.

  "So what?" he said, "I can always go back to butchering, can't I?" He scraped together some money and bought some pigs to raise and slaughter, but before a month was out, he was flat on his back, sick in bed.

  He had some strange disease. The blood and pus coming out of his nose hurt so much that he screamed. The people who heard him said he sounded just like a stuck pig!

77.猪圈里的妇人
 
  安徽省的省府有个有趣的名字:合肥。

  附近一个叫排头的村子里,有个叫宣四的人,他是一个有二十多年经验的杀猪屠夫。他做这门生意赚了很多钱,还小心地存起来,买了三间房子。他自己住一间,另外两间租出去。他还有一百多亩上好的田地。

  也就是说,他已经赚了足够的钱,可以退休养老了。但是很少人会知足。实际上,宣已经习惯了要杀猪,如果他哪一天不杀点什么就觉得不对劲。假日时,他就老在磨刀。

  一天早上,他像往常一样早早起床开始他一天的工作。他的妻子去上厕所,厕所就在猪圈旁的旧屋子里。她不经意瞧了一眼猪圈,突然放声尖叫。她丈夫赶紧跑了过来。

  “怎么了?怎么了?”

  “我望了一下猪圈,看到那里躺着两位妇人,不是猪!我想这可能是我的幻觉,但是我揉揉眼睛再看,果真是两位妇人!”

  “我想这是一个预兆,亲爱的。求求你,不要再杀猪了!”

  “哈哈哈!”宣四笑起来,“你真是幽默!你还没睡醒呢!”

  宣夫人看到他不听,就抓起他的刀扔到厕所的粪坑里去了。宣四这天没有杀猪,而是去买了一把新刀子。

  第二天宣夫人叫她的父母来劝劝她丈夫。“看,你已经有了足够的钱,后半生可以生活无忧了。你为什么不听听你妻子的话,歇一歇呢?”

  “杀猪是我的职业。”

  “如果你不回头,我们的女儿就会搬出去。”

  宣回想起他们多年的婚姻生活,还有他杀猪挣来的钱。

  “我看还是让她搬出去吧。”

  宣分给他的前妻一半财产,还把孩子的监护权给了她。当所有的事情办好后,宣又开始杀猪了。他杀了猪圈里的猪,就是他妻子认为是妇人的那些猪。

  他还把它们的小猪杀了。他刚杀完,有人跑来通知他他的孩子忽然死了。
  宣很懊悔,但是他又很顽固,不肯承认自己错了。他开始赌钱,想忘掉自己的苦恼。不久,所有的赌徒都知道只要宣进了赌场,他们的口袋就会装满钱,因为每次他赌钱都会输。

  不久以后,他把剩下所有的钱都输光了。

  “那又怎么样呢?”他说,“我总还可以再杀猪的。”他省了一些钱,买了一些小猪,想把它们养大杀了。但是一个月还没过,他便卧病在床。

  他得了一种怪病。血和脓从他的鼻子里流出来,他疼的尖叫。听到他叫唤的人都说他听上去就像是被只被刀子刺的猪一样!


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